Come Sunday morning, Herb and I rose and began the odious job of emptying out all of our storage spaces. I was determined to attempt to use the time to "spring clean", give away unneeded things and wipe down all of our cabinets. Three garbage bags and four give away bags later our house was a complete disaster area! Our kitchen contents alone occupied the whole of our dining room table, coffee table and pink chairs! I reminded Herb that this is why the biggest room in our eventual home needs to be the kitchen. He said he never doubted that fact for a moment. Our emptied closets consumed the floor of the office entirely! Our bathroom lived in two laundry baskets. We have so much stuff, and yet I struggled to know what to get rid of. Much of it is useful and much of it is sentimental, yet all of it felt like clutter. Perhaps that's just because it was spread all over my house! Herb and I both had quite the aversion to the clutter generated, and he declared that as soon as we were showered we weren't returning to the house until bedtime. So we left.
We went to lunch, to the movies, to the mall, to church, to some friends' house and fully escaped our home for the day. Although I was happy to be away from the clutter, I so disliked not seeing the inside of my home all day long. Especially on a Sunday, my supposed day of rest. Even though all of the activities we did seem unlike work, it still wasn't the same type of rest generated by sitting on my couch watching a good baseball game. Nevertheless we escaped our home for day one.
Day two arrived and the exterminators ousted us again in a different way. They were scheduled to arrive between 9 and 10 and we weren't allowed near our apartment for four hours after they finished. Oy! So Herb and I left again to try and fill our days with non-home locations. Herb went to school, as did I. Not only was I ousted, but I really wasn't feeling well. I just wanted to be home in my bed, but alas, that was not to be. So off I trudged to be productive at school. I did find some reprieve in lunch and a movie with a good friend in the afternoon. But I knew that once I arrived home, I still had to face the clutter! Arg!
When we returned come evening, we began the tedious task of putting everything back. Two more garbage bags full, and one more give away bag later, we had returned items to their rightful location. We do have a bit more space and a bit less clutter, but the days left me impatient in our house buying process. I don't want to feel like we're sufficiently wedged in every nook and cranny of this space we've rented. I don't want to feel like there is no more room for anything else. But that's how I feel. And I question this emotion. Shouldn't I just get rid of more things? Live more simplistically? Embrace the small space? After all, this is the reality for so many people around the US and the world. I should be content. Get rid of clutter. But should be and is are sometimes distant destinations.
The truth is Herb and I will be fine in this apartment. God will provide for us, protect us, and make room for us here. But I will still dream of more, and someday more will become a reality. Until then, I will do my very best to hold the clutter at bay. At least I've gotten good at hiding it away. Just ask my living room floor how much was really in my cabinets and drawers!
1 comment:
Having just had the joy of moving, I can empathize and identify with the process of culling through possessions and identifying what is meaningful and necessary, and what is not. As you said, in light of how so many others in the global community live, I was challenged to examine what my stuff means to me and why. Questions that I found myself wrstling with: what does it mean to live simply; what does it mean to live with an awareness of global poverty and what is my proper, Christ like response; in what ways do I justify a lifestyle that is excessive and self centered? I don't have any answers, but I know that for me the asking is important.
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