All that can be shaken...

I think I've mentioned that I'm reading this new book called Out of Control and Loving It! which is definitely a challenging title, let alone dealing with the content in the book. But it is SO good in challenging me to truly give my life over to and trust God. Today's chapter was about how God shakes us to create a stronger foundation in Him. The exact quote was this: "If you are receiving your affirmation, love, self-worth, joy, strength, and acceptance from anywhere but God, He will shake it." I can't deny this passage was written for me, that is pretty much my life in a nutshell right now. I feel like this year has been one big earthquake! From the book incident, to the first house falling through, to the lack of job for Herb, to various challenges at school, I feel like God is trying to rouse me.

First of all, up until this year, school was a place where I felt confident and where I drew much of my self-worth. I am good at teaching, kids and admin like me; it felt good to be at school. But that isn't the identity God wanted for me. He didn't want me to think I can earn my worth or create love and admiration for myself. Rather He wanted to remind me that He is my self-worth, He is the reason I can so ably teach my students. He is my source of strength, my foundation.

I already wrote about how God took the first house from us to help me see that I didn't deserve the house, but that rather it was a blessing from Him. And now He is still asking Herb and I to trust He will provide for us amply with or without the blessing of a full-time job.

God is shaking us and I'm going to be honest, it's not comfortable. It's disconcerting and many times lonely, but He is drawing us to Him, no doubt. We are in prayer more, together and apart. We are in the word more, talking about how scripture is shaping us. We are challenging one another to be more forgiving and accepting of those around us. We are asking God to provide no matter what our financial or employable status is. I am trying to give God my classroom more and more, to make it less about me and more about His work. I want the firm foundation, and if that means shaking, well, so be it. Now God, just be merciful in the earthquake, let me feel Your loving arms around me. Let me know that You have a plan and believe it whole heartedly. Let me stand on Your solid ground as You shake away the sinking sand.