A New Discovery

I've heard over and over again about the Love Languages and how understanding your Love Language is key to successful relationships. I couldn't agree more that it is so important to know how to love the people around you, rather to know how they experience love. My problem is that I have always felt like all of them applied to me but none of them fit exactly right. I do feel loved when someone does something nice for me, but it doesn't overflow me with emotion. I love getting an encouraging email from a friend, but it's not a "wow, in this moment I feel loved!" response. Gifts are great and I LOVE when they are thoughtful, but again, not quite it. I do love a good hug, but still just not right. The same goes for spending time with people, although I think this is probably the closest one I can find that makes me feel all warm and fuzzy. So you see, I have for some time been in a bit of a quandary about how exactly it is that I experience love. That is until last night when I had a new discovery:

Information is my love language. Let me explain because I know it sounds REALLY weird, but hopefully it will make sense when I'm done.

Last night we attended a party where the hosts announced that they are pregnant (yay Cara and Jon), but almost instantly after I found out, I felt the need to call my good friend who wasn't there because we'd been discussing our theories about this in earlier weeks. It sounds gossipy, but it really wasn't. If she'd have been there, she would've found out that same way. As I called her and we gushed about our excitement, she thanked me for calling. And my response was "No problem, if you had been there I would've wanted someone to let me know." This response started me thinking:

*Although it's in the past, a friend told me she was pregnant along with the group instead of individually, which at the time was so sad for me. I didn't feel individually included in her exciting information.

*Earlier in the day I had a conversation with Melinda about her appointment with the midwife. I said "Give me all the information. I want to know everything!"

*I got off of the phone Thursday night and recounted my conversation to Herb. I asked him if he cared about my ramblings, to which he replied no, but he listens anyway because he knows I want to share it. He knows I need to tell my stories.

*I show my love for others by telling stories about myself, including details and making sure they are in the know in my life.

*I feel SO loved when people remember details about me that I've said in the past or when the check up on concerns I've expressed before.

*I had a situation at work yesterday where I was so angry and hurt because I was left out of an important information loop.

*Throughout the whole book nonsense, I was hurt because I didn't know what my administrators' were thinking and doing.

*I long to talk to people for hours, to hear stories about their lives. Their words, no matter how trivial, make me feel loved.

*Books have the ability to make me feel warm and fuzzy, especially when I feel the author has shared a piece of himself with me.

Information is my love language. Hopefully you don't take this to think I'm a gossip because I hope not to be. I don't want to know what you know about others, I want to know what you know about yourself. Tell me your thoughts on the world and what you've learned through your experiences and I will feel so incredibly loved. Let me tell my stories and I feel at ease in your presence. It's not about "knowledge making arrogant", it is about you letting me into your world. It makes me feel wanted to know that you desire me to be a part of your experiences. Perhaps it's that it makes me feel included. I haven't quite dissected all of the implications of this new discovery, but I'm quite confident that I have hit the nail on the head here.

So if I'm rambling on and on, try to listen--I'll feel SO loved. If I ask you annoying questions that are seemingly endless, know that it's not because I'm being nosy, I'm trying to love you, the Katie way.