Dwelling

One thing I have asked from the LORD, that I shall seek:
That I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life,
To behold the beauty of the LORD
And to meditate in His temple.
For in the day of trouble He will conceal me in His tabernacle;
In the secret place of His tent He will hide me;
He will lift me up on a rock.
And now my head will be lifted up above my enemies around me,
And I will offer in His tent sacrifices with shouts of joy;
I will sing, yes, I will sing praises to the LORD.
Psalm 27:4-6

I was standing in church tonight renewing my commitment to walk with the Lord, standing with my fellow believers vowing to God that I am willing to do what He asks of me, willing to let go of myself and hang on to His calling. As I spoke aloud my allegiance to my God, He brought a verse to my heart, Psalm 27:4, specifically the words "that I may dwell in the house of the Lord all the days of my life." I have loved this verse for a very long time; the idea of sanctuary it conjures for me is majestic and comforting. But tonight new words jumped out of this verse into my heart--all the days of my life. Not just the good days, not just the awful days, all of my days. I get to dwell with God all of my days--the days when I am angry with Him, the days I am disappointed in this seemingly unclear plan, the days where my heart aches so much I cannot breathe. All of my days I am invited to dwell, to dwell with Him.

After this revelation I searched back through scripture for the verse and found the context. Not only do I get to dwell with Him, He will hide me in His most secret place, especially in those days of trouble. God does not look at me, broken, weary, frustrated, sad me and ask me to leave, instead in those moments He invites me deeper, further into dwelling with Him. He escorts me past the palace guards, past the throngs of people begging for moments of His time, into His most secret, His most intimate of places and just allows me to be, allows me to hide from the world that is so torturing me. I am invited to dwell, just to be, with Him, even and especially in my most broken of moments. It is no wonder that in the Lord's house we are able to behold His beauty--how can it be anything but beautiful to have someone love you and invite you deeper into His world in your most bedraggled of states?

So this is one thing that I will ask and seek: that I may dwell, dwell with Him, in His most secret of places, where He invites me to go. And then "surely goodness and lovingkindness shall follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the Lord forever" (Psalm 23:6).